[Note: This series originally started as a project on Reddit, and we are archiving the posts here on our site. You can find the original Bible Study posts here.]
Happy Sunday! This week, we’re tackling Mingi’s page, and as part of our Good Works, we took a short side step to learn about our Enneagrams. Here’s a link to the online test we used in case you’d like to pre-game your bible study with a personality test. Spoiler alert: BobbyJ is a 5, and I am a 7.
And now, on to, The Sound of His Laughter
Please light your favorite candle, turn on the Official Bible Study Playlist, and grab your bible–or otherwise do whatever it is you like to do to find your own personal brand of bliss.
01: What are your thoughts on the page?
GD: This page feels notably different to me right from the start. Like, it's longer, but it also feels slightly... deeper? Like the conflict Mingi has is clear and compelling
BobbyJ: Which is frustrating for reasons that we'll get to later. Somehow Mingi's entry feels more straightforward, like he's cutting right to the chase.
GD: Yes, straightforward is a good way to phrase it. It seems like Mingi and Yeosang have the same conflict, but reversed? If that makes sense? They don't believe they are allowed to have dreams because of who they are and where they came from. it's just the who they are and where they came from is different.
BobbyJ: It feels like it's not that Mingi thinks he doesn't deserve his dreams--but that he recognizes the reality. That being extremely poor limits what you are able to do.
GD: It's interesting; we've talked about why each boy wants to follow this dream, and it seems like Mingi is one of the purest ones--it's for the love of the game. He loves music. And you and I have definitely talked about how art is a luxury that some people don't have--it is hard to chase after art when you are fighting to have your basic needs met, even if that's when you need art the most.
BobbyJ: It reminds me of a tshirt I saw a teacher wear on insta the other say--it said "Maslow before Bloom." The principle applies here I think
GD: lol teachers are hilarious
BobbyJ: But for him, art--music in this case--isn't just a luxury. It's his "one and only relief". Music is his Maslow, so to speak
GD: I think that might be true for more people than we think? Like if we made time for art even when there is no time or space, we might find that it should fit into maslow's for many people--if that makes any sense. But I can still imagine that the people around Mingi watching this--parents, family members, society--might not be sympathetic of this.
BobbyJ: I feel like I don't want to hone in on any one line for fear that becomes the line we're supposed to discuss but I keep getting caught on the line where he talks about people laughing at him because he wants to die and that it must be unusual for a teenager to feel that way. But we know it's not that unusual. So once again, we see the theme of loneliness. He feels very much like people can't relate to him.
GD: When I was reading him talk about Wooyoung, it sort of reminded me of how critical a single friend can be to someone? I've noted before that most of my friend group is because I met a single person, and from that person, I met many persons, each person introducing me to a new person. Wooyoung is sort of doing that here. Mingi meets the rest of them because Wooyoung drags him along.
BobbyJ: Yes, Wooyoung features very heavily in this entry. More than we've seen another member feature so far. Like Yunho mentions Hongjoong and San mentions Wooyoung, but not this much
GD: It's not even just.. and I hung out with Wooyoung. We learn almost as much about Wooyoung's personality as we do about Mingi's?
BobbyJ: It's notable that they've known each other a long time. And it's taken that long for Woo to wear Mingi down.
GD: I was noticing that Mingi says he doesn't answer when others talk to him, which is interesting in that he's almost reinforcing his own isolation? Absolutely a behavior I do all the time, especially when I'm feeling burnt out or tired. Just slowly withdraw until I'm alone and then be like "oh where did all my friends go".
Jumping ahead slightly, but I feel like it's notable that one of the things that seems to break Mingi down eventually is Wooyoung's laugh, and Wooyoung calls his laugh a defense mechanism to overcome shyness (relatable). So it's interesting to contrast those two experiences, and something I'd like to pin for further discussion when we read Woo.
BobbyJ: I just noticed the title. I feel like we all need a Wooyoung, someone who will be gently relentless in drawing us out of ourselves when we've withdrawn for too long. Even Wooyoungs need a Wooyoung bc you can't be Wooyoung all the time.
GD: Ugh, this all just reminds me of how great I think Wooyoung is.
BobbyJ: He is very great. Mingi seems to agree since he's shining so much of his spotlight on Woo instead of himself
GD: I was going to make a point about contrast between San and Mingi, but I don't actually know what my point is.
BobbyJ: Maybe it needs to simmer a bit. But their approach to loneliness is completely different
GD: Yes. Something along those lines.
BobbyJ: San continually tries to make new friends even knowing it probably won't work out; Mingi has already decided it won't work out and so he doesn't try. San wears a mask--smiling and laughing in spite of his loneliness. Mingi presents himself to the world as is.
GD: I think I really love how they're all set up differently with the same problem, and that the story gives them a space where the thing that matters is their similarities more than their differences. I think it's very clever.
BobbyJ: Something I want to ponder once we get into the actual story is how the narrative would be different if Ateez didn't have these particular backstories. If they were just happy-go-lucky dancers and singers, would that change the decisions they make once they get swept up in the adventure?
GD: It's sort of like my question over whether they ever really had a choice to get involved with Strictland, and with Mingi's connection to music being his one and only relief… I just think it's a powerful motivator. To make sure that music still exists in the world would be particularly compelling to him, plus you have the added set up of him feeling so powerless here at the start. All of them feel pretty powerless, actually. Very not in control of their own lives.
Oh, Mingi's picture is interesting--the way he's half inside and half outside.
BobbyJ: The doors being almost closed rather than wide open gives me this feeling like it wouldn't take much for them to close him out. Like his position with the group is tenuous. Also that he has his feet firmly planted in both worlds--kind of like Yeo? He's in for now--but he remembers what's waiting for him outside.
GD: It's hard to know how much a tenuous position is self inflicted or actual reality. How does Mingi fit into this warehouse beyond his relationship with Wooyoung, you know?
BobbyJ: I feel like it's both--his isolation doesn't come from nowhere
GD: His and Hongjoong's goals could be very similar or they could be incredibly at odds, depending on a lot of things. Like Hongjoong wants to be a star, and to do that he's going to dance and make music; Mingi wants to make music. Their goals overlap, but could also cause friction. I feel like I have some point about Mingi being in it for the love of the game, but it's buried under my headache, so it will not be coming today. Perhaps my thoughts will develop more in the future.
BobbyJ: So, we know that Hwa pursues music for personal freedom. But what does that mean for his future? Does he want it to be his profession like Hongjoong and maybe Yunho? People who enjoy the same thing but have different goals for it might not pursue it with the same intensity. So, yeah, I think it could cause tension
GD: The trouble is, we have no idea what "Seonghwa's way" is at this point. We saw his breaking point, and we saw other's experience his transformed self. So it's hard to know what he wants.
BobbyJ: For some of them music is their future; for others it's their present–just keeping them tethered together
GD: I think I have some point about capitalism and the monetization of passions, and perhaps it will come out in further bible study. This month's Anti Capitalism thoughts--it's been a while, so it's probably time.
BobbyJ: Has it been a while? Feels like it keeps coming up
GD: Well it doesn't count when you keep making the same anti-capitalism thought over and over because you forgot you made it. Thiis one will be New, maybe.
BobbyJ: Anyways, I've made a note for future reference for when your Thought is ready.
GD: Oh! on the picture–the way his cheek is bleeding
BobbyJ: OH. It's on his right--which means this is after Jongho punched him?
GD: The picture is, at least. I guess the question is, is the writing?
BobbyJ: I don't think so. Because he's still questioning if he's going to leave. But Jongho punches after he says he's leaving. And we find out later he leaves because of his grandmother, but there's no mention of her.
GD: I'm not sure it matters for Mingi's entry, anyways. I think I could make a compelling case either way for where this entry takes place, but I'm not sure it changes how I interpret the entry. Because, what is the point of Mingi’s entry? It tells us that he's isolated, and I think also scared. He's not scared of dying, but I think he is scared of losing his relief. I think he'd rather die or die metaphorically by giving up any dreams than give up music. And I think Wooyoung's laughter represents something Important to Mingi, almost like the Be Free bracelet Seonghwa found. And it's notable to me that the laughter doesn't mean the same thing to Wooyoung, which makes me wonder about the girl Seonghwa found--and what dancing meant to her. (Not that it matters, but there's some thematic interest there about what people see and what is really happening)
BobbyJ: Is there a difference though? Let's say the girl was dancing for stress relief or because she was angry or maybe she was practicing for a competition. If what Seonghwa saw was freedom, is that not also true?
GD: I suppose what's generally more important is our interpretation of what's happening, instead of what's really happening, as it's our interpretation of the world that influences the decisions we make. I'm going to take us on a fun tangent from when I was an English teacher. I remember this group of students coming by, all of whom were making like solid 100s in my class, and them telling me how hard they thought the class was. To which I was like ?????? But it was because we all had a different interpretation of the story we read, and so we'd have these class discussions where every one would give conflicting responses, and I'd just be like, great point, great point. And my 8th graders just wanted to know what the right answer was. It was uncomfortable to them that multiple answers were correct. And they didn't like it when my interpretation was different than theirs but they still got the answer correct
BobbyJ: Middle schoolers do not like uncertainties for sure. One of the things I say to them all the time is there are no wrong answers, only unsupported answers.
GD: I think it was Jongho, but it may have been Yunho (definitely one of 2ho), who was discussing what their lore means, and they said something just like "whatever you think is right". And I've always really loved that answer.
BobbyJ: That was Jongho I believe. Wait–actually, now I'm not sure bc I can picture Yunho saying it
GD: You could argue that it's a blow off answer because he doesn't know the lore (and I'm sure that could be true), but I think he's right. People will get what they need out of the story, and I think our interpretation is colored by what we need. And the same can be applied to Mingi interpreting Wooyoung's laugh. Mingi seems like a person who needs that laughter and lightness in his life. It doesn't really matter what Wooyoung means when he laughs
BobbyJ: Not to Mingi, no. I feel like I would like some insight into "Woo-ong." Does it mean something? It reminds me of how Woo calls Mingi Mangi which doesn't make sense to me, but I'm sure it does to them
GD: Hold on [pauses to take multiple minutes messing with different translation apps.] Well, I've used the Google Translate app on the Korean to see, and there are some mild differences. Instead of "out of shyness", it's "Unknowingly, I laughed at Wooyoung's unique laugh. Then, for some reason, I was embarrassed, so I deliberately called him [Burdock]". Then, when I type this into Papago, I also get "it's called 'woo language'”.
BobbyJ: Is he calling him annoying? Because he clings to him? Like in a playful way?
GD: It sounds like playful making fun of, with him saying Wooyoung speaks in his own special way, mostly because of his laugh? So teasing him a bit to save face. We really need to learn Korean so that we can understand these nuances on our own, and also because I'm sure just as much is lost through these multiple translation apps I just used.
BobbyJ: Well, we know Koreans love their wordplay. If Woo-ong also translates to burdock, which is a weed common to North Asia that has burrs that stick to you, Mingi could also be referring to the fact that Woo wouldn't leave him alone.
GD: ah, interesting. I think either of those interpretations seems to offer a better insight than the translation in the book. The translation in the book makes it seem like he's nervous and calling Wooyoung like a cutesy name? I don't know it always read weirdly out of character.
BobbyJ: Yeah, Mingi definitely wouldn't be cute after closing himself off for so long
GD: But him playfully making fun of him to show that he's been accepted seems very much in character and also similar to how ateez actually seems to treat each other?
BobbyJ: I wonder why Wooyoung zeroed in on Mingi
GD: I've had the same thought but wasn't sure if it should be addressed today or when we get to Wooyoung. It seems pretty clear why Mingi was drawn to Wooyoung... but we're given no obvious reason for Wooyoung to become so involved with Mingi.
BobbyJ: Well, spoilers, Woo doesn't even mention Mingi
GD: Poor Mingi 😦
BobbyJ: Reminds me of whatever that content was where they had to leave flowers or something in each others' lockers?
GD: An episode of wanteez, I think. A fun episode.
BobbyJ: Ah, right. I should rewatch those.
GD: This is notably our first mention of Mingi. So we basically have Mingi talking about Mingi, and then Jongho talking about hitting MIngi.
BobbyJ: Well San and Yeo never get mentioned at all
GD: Interesting the ties they've made. Perhaps we should make our mental murder board a physical murder board so that I can pull out my red string
BobbyJ: Jongho doesn't get mentioned either.
GD: It seems like the original 4 are Wooyoung, Seonghwa, Hongjoong, and Yunho. The rest are pulled in later. I'm including Wooyoung as part of the original for Reasons that I won't explore right now.
BobbyJ: It does seem though that he's always been there: a founding member. I've just read Jongho's entry and I already have thoughts. I'll save those for later, but I do need to make a correction: he's not trying to join a national team like I said last week. He wants to be the youngest (15!) player to win nationals
GD: I just read the outro like some sort of psychopath. Really hard to stay focused. Should we move to bible study?
BobbyJ: Yes. Let's.
02: Sacred Practice
This week, we are turning to the four part reading practice where we choose a random line and look at it through four lenses. What’s happening at a narrative level? What’s happening at an allegorical/metaphorical level? What’s does this remind of us in our own lives? What change is the text inviting us to make?
The line today is:
"It was around that time too when I followed him to the hideout for the first time; the place where I could dream."
GD: Alright. What is happening narratively?
BobbyJ: Mingi says he's started eating with Wooyoung regularly. So now he's going to the after school hideout as well.
GD: Yeah, it's basically the line where he meets Ateez and learns about the warehouse. Actually a very important line. It would be good to know who all was at the Warehouse at this point, but the story doesn't tell us that
BobbyJ: Impossible to say
GD: We know Seonghwa, Hongjoong, and Yunho for sure because we know that Wooyoung meets them all together.
BobbyJ: And Woo of course. I feel like San is probably there but not Yeo yet. And I don't even have the first clue about Jongho
GD: So, narratively, we know that Mingi is meeting at least 3 new friends who will accept him for who he is at a location that has already been developed as sacred. So what is happening at an allegorical/metaphorical level?
BobbyJ: He's being given permission to dream, apparently for the first time. Or perhaps, he's found a safe place in which he feels safe enough to dream unlike the outside world
GD: Yeah, the word dream is the one that stuck out to me too. Dream having both a metaphorical component and a functional story one with their lore. The word hideout is also interesting to me. I was trying to remember who all has called it a hideout. Hongjoong was the only one I saw when I briefly glanced back through it.
BobbyJ: Hwa, Yunho and San don't even talk about it
GD: Hideout reminds me of Peter Pan and the lost boys though. It makes me think that Mingi is trying to hide more so than maybe some of the others, which would make sense given the unique stress he has being poor in this world
BobbyJ: Yeo calls it a shabby warehouse. I feel like Yeo probably sees the warehouse the same way now though. He's hiding from his parents' expectations. For the others, there's something "out there" that they want and the warehouse is just a space to get them there. Hongjoong and Yunho specifically. Maybe Hwa?
GD: I think that's true for Wooyoung too, though I know we haven't gotten there. What Mingi wants is within the warehouse--an escape, the relief that music brings.
BobbyJ: Like, the warehouse gives him what he gets from wearing his headphones outside
GD: I've also been tripped up by the word followed a couple of times today? So, you know, what does it mean to follow someone. I think Mingi was invited by Wooyoung, but the story doesn't necessarily say that. The idea of "following the leader" also keeps coming to my mind? Do they perhaps sing that song in the Disney Peter Pan (which no one should watch because it's Awful)
BobbyJ: It doesn't make sense with his character to be, like, sneaking around following Woo to see where he goes. I get the sense that it's more like he's a bit reluctant. Letting Woo in was one thing; meeting all these new people is another. (Do they not all attend the same school?). I also find it interesting that he refers to Hongjoong et al. as Woo's "music team". And I wonder if Woo has called them that on purpose.
Here's what I'm thinking--Woo sees that Mingi loves music (headphones) and also seems to be lonely. And I think at first Woo just couldn't stand to see someone be so lonely and closed off. But maybe after getting to know him, he realizes that he would be a good fit for the group. But Mingi doesn't want friends. However, he loves music. So maybe that's how Woo sells them. And once he's in, he's trapped. . . theoretically
GD: He does seem to accept them as friends once he is there, regardless of if he wanted to have friends. In some ways, I think friends are a little bit like art. They can feel like a luxury while also being a necessity.
BobbyJ: I was just thinking--I don't think it's that he doesn't want them but that he thinks he can't afford them
GD: Friends, dreams, art--those are all for other people who don't have to fight every day just to survive. But... those are all the things that make life hopeful?
BobbyJ: Yes, but at the same time, people are tricky
GD: they are, yes
BobbyJ: There are absolutely people that are too expensive. Too much time, energy, effort--not a lot of return on investment
GD: This is something I think about a lot. The idea that relationships should provide you with something, which sounds.. maybe bad? Like I'm not trying to say that I’m just going around thinking about what I get out of relationships, but it's more like, I put a lot into almost all of my relationships, and I can't be a martyr; the things I put in, I need to get back somehow, even if only existentially
BobbyJ: Relationships are supposed to go both ways. That's the whole point
GD: One of my closest friends, when she's feeling tired, she tells me that she's run out of spoons. I think she got it from somewhere else, but this idea that I only have a given amount of spoons, and I can give those spoons out and use them up, but at the end, if I don't replenish my spoons, I have no more to give or use
BobbyJ: What do you know about enneagram?
GD: Nothing
BobbyJ: Okay. So, I am not an expert, but I do love all things about categorizing personalities. Enneagram is about what motivates you. There are nine types. I'm a 5. I am motivated by the search for truth, essentially.
GD: A questioner. Yes.
BobbyJ: Right. It's all related. But one of a 5's traits is that we have a limited amount of social battery for each day. I only have so much of myself to give to other people each day. And once I'm spent, the only thing that replenishes me is being by myself.
[editor's note: the next 45 minutes were spent struggling to find a free test that I could take to learn my own Enneagram and a lot of complaining, which I’ve cut for reasons that would be clear if I hadn’t]
BobbyJ: Anyways--my point that I don't think I made was that some people seem to have endless capital to invest in other people.They have enough social energy that they can continuously court someone who doesn't ever give them anything in return. But Mingi, he doesn't have that energy to spare. Maybe he's been burned before maybe he's basing his belief on observations. And I truly don't think there are a lot of people who would befriend someone like Mingi. This is why someone like Wooyoung is so important and necessary to Mingi. That Mingi can't give as much isn't about selfishness, it's about self-preservation.
GD: So much of who we are and what we can give is so dependent on our circumstances, and I find it endlessly frustrating that some people don't see that. It would be easy to say that Mingi should just (fill in the blank), but Mingi is trying his best here.
BobbyJ: It reminds me of all the times well-meaning busybodies have told me to just "put yourself out there". Like what does that even mean?
GD: Same. I had a point about something, but I've long forgotten it. Should we go to the next step? which is, lol, what does the text remind you of in your own life? I don't even remember the text. I will have to re-read it.
BobbyJ: I feel like you already answered this one--the one friend that opens to the door to other friends
GD: Yes; that is what it reminds me of.
BobbyJ: I suppose it reminds me of that as well but also the struggle of being an introvert in an extrovert's world. But also how very important those extroverts are.
GD: that reminds me of a book whose title I forgot–but it was like a pop psych book. The tipping point? Maybe? About the right people finding and spreading a thing. You need the tipping friend.
BobbyJ: Yes. But they are hard to find. As they are not in my house with me. Solution: extroverts need to make house calls.
GD: Well. After 10 years, I've finished this Enneagram test to discover that it's wrong. It says I'm a 7.
BobbyJ: That was one of my guesses actually.
GD: 😮💨 Perhaps I am a 7. In fairness, a lot of this is true. Trouble focusing on one thing, need to practice gratefulness, very impulsive.
BobbyJ: Something to keep in mind is that there's a healthy 7 and an unhealthy 7. So some things will be true when you're in a good state of mind and others won't.
GD: It doesn't read totally incorrect, but I feel like I've lost the whole plot of the day. So I feel all adrift.
BobbyJ: Perhaps you need to sit with it for a while.
GD: Anyways, on extroverts, I think it's notable that the one friend I made who introduced me to all of their friends is an introvert. And I sought them out. Like, one day, I had an impulse to talk to her, and then 8 years later here we are. Which is how I've made all of my friends. I found someone I was drawn to for whatever reason, and then I Wooyoung-ed them.
BobbyJ: Maybe Wooyoung also didn't know what drew him to Mingi
GD: This is also how I forced you to be my friend–with this book club turned bible study
BobbyJ: It is indeed. I think this is how I've made all my friends actually. Someone was just like "we're friends now".
GD: I feel like that's something I've done my whole life.
BobbyJ: It is a precious gift. Truly.
GD: I remember in high school, I didn't have many people I really liked even though I had friends, and I went up to this one girl who I'd seen reading Harry Potter. And I remember like putting my arm in hers and being like "I heard you like Harry Potter". And then we were best friends for four years.
BobbyJ: Basically how I became friends with my high school bff. She just claimed me. We had nothing in common though. To this day, I don't know why she liked me.
GD: I think there is a lightening bolt moment for some people, and then it just happens. The snowy road breaking–a before, and an after
BobbyJ: That's not how it is with me. I generally am not fully aware that it's happening. It'll just be a few months and realization will dawn. Like "oh, I guess I'm friends with this person now".
GD: One of my friends makes fun of me because in most of my stories there's a part where I go "and then I was like fuck it" and talk about the snap decision I made.
BobbyJ: How very 7 of you
GD: But that is how it is.. a growing sense of restlessness until a snap decision has been made that changes everything. I suppose we should talk about what this is inviting us to do in our own life?
I actually have been invited to do something. I think it is inviting me to slow down a bit and dream my big dreams again. I think for a bit I've just been dealing with the consequences of all my snap decisions--like quitting my job, starting a business, buying a house, etc etc etc--and I've sort of forgotten why I made those snap decisions? I'd like to remember my dreams and what those snap decisions were all in search of
BobbyJ: I think I need to be a bit more open with the people around me. Not like a "put myself out there" situation but just softening up a bit? I tend to be very guarded because of the aforementioned small social battery so I feel the need to be very choosy with who I spend it on. But I think I've become a bit too walled up in recent years
GD: It’s understandable. Not having a lot of social space makes it hard, but balance is good. Should we mental murder board?
03: Mental Murder Board
BobbyJ: We've already mentioned his similarities with Yeo which I feel is relevant here.
GD: I think his contrast with San is also relevant. At least their approach to friendship
BobbyJ: Also his relationship with music. It's the music itself that he loves not anything that comes with it
GD: I didn’t see any winter or summer terminology stick out? His love of music makes me think of the sort of literary device of laughter being like music.
BobbyJ: We don't really see any of the others spending time together outside of the warehouse. But Mingi and Woo are friends before they are both part of the group
GD: Yeah I have a lot of questions about that. And where every one else is while they’re at school
But I will not ask them.
BobbyJ: San's Woo's and Mingi's entries all mention laughter
GD: Laughter a surprisingly important plot thread. Makes me want to look through lyrics for mentions of laughter.
BobbyJ: Hongjoong's signature laugh
GD: Oh my god obviously. How could I forget?
Part 4: The Closing Hymn
BobbyJ: I have mine. I pick Promise. I think Mingi needs the reassurance that his people will continue to be there for him.
GD: I feel drawn to WDIG. I think because of Mingi feeling half in and half out. There’s a lot of uncertainty and chaos to his page.I like that your song is often what they need and mine is where they are.
BobbyJ: I'm sure that says something very interesting about how our brains work
GD: Probably has something to do with wanting to solve it vs knowing that you’re not alone
BobbyJ: I am a problem solver. It's a problem.
GD: I’ve always felt like the most important thing in the whole world is for people to be Seen for who they are. So I try to match a song with what they’re feeling, and you try to give them a song that will help them not have to feel that way anymore. And it’s likely they need both, so great teamwork from us
BobbyJ: Excellent. Well done everybody
Comments