[Note: This series originally started as a project on Reddit, and we will be posting concurrently on both sites for the next month.]
Welcome once again to our weekly bible study! This week, we journey with Yunho towards the dump and learn more about Left Eye's story as we do.
01: what are your thoughts on the page?
BobbyJ: Puppy is attending bible study with me and will be henceforth
GD: Oh good. It's nice for his inaugural one to be his father's
I have read Yunho's page and have many thoughts
BobbyJ: I have questions upon questions
GD: The discussion of how Left Eye's daughter dies reminds me so distinctly of Fahrenheit 451. I feel like I should go get the book because I think I have the lines underlined. They like talk about how fast everyone moves, never looking at the ground, and that pedestrians will get run over on these super fast highways
BobbyJ: I think I have read Fahrenheit 451 but I don't remember anything about it. Which tells me that I wasn't in the mood to read it and should probably try again
GD: And the girl (Clarisse?) that he meets talks about liking to go for walks and nature and such
The whole book was spun off of a short story called The Pedestrian, and I think they also talk about people getting run over in it? Or maybe that it's illegal to be a pedestrian because they get run over? I'm less familiar with the short story
BobbyJ: Could be a book club
GD: Hold on I need to find it or it will drive me crazy
BobbyJ: I have two somewhat related thoughts while you're looking.
First, it takes me back to the very beginning when they talk about the procession of busy people
Also didn't Yeosang talk about people never looking at the sky or something bc they were staring at their phones (small devices)?
Yes, he did
GD: Quote from Clarisse who supposedly gets run over as a pedestrian and killed 4 days after Montag meets her: "I sometimes think drivers don't know what grass is, or flowers, because they never see them slowly,’ she said. ‘If you showed a driver a green blur, Oh yes! he'd say, that's grass! A pink blur? That's a rose garden! White blurs are houses. Brown blurs are cows. My uncle drove slowly on a highway once. He drove forty miles an hour and they jailed him for two days. Isn't that funny, and sad, too?'"
I knew I had it underlined
Anyways, yes, it all goes back to this idea of no one stopping to look outside of their immediate field of vision
BobbyJ: I think too--a bit more distantly--the idea of being so focused on results
I sometimes wonder if fans, specifically Atinys, even take the time to enjoy a comeback when they're so busy streaming and voting
I've seen people say on twitter that they don't have time to watch the interviews and such because they're busy streaming and collecting all the dumb things we have to collect
Like, does anyone watch music videos for fun anymore?
GD: It's a real challenge. Because we know ateez do want the results--that those results make them happy, anyways. But I suppose it's a cost-benefit?
For the most part, I like streaming, but I have very distinct memories of the last few hours before billboard tracking ended of being absolutely miserable this comeback and I don't think that's ever happened to me before
BobbyJ: I think a balance needs to be struck. I know for sure in our fandom there are people who get so irritated if you mention streaming and such--to the point that I think some people are so turned off by the guilt-tripping and the mentality that it's our actual job to do these things to support Ateez that they just don't do anything at all. And I wonder if perhaps easing up on this worker bee mentality would help make things more palatable for those who would normally not bother
I don't know if that made any sense
I do also know that it's not the fandom's fault that we're like this. It's the system that found ways to profit off of fandom
GD: It's hard to know what that balance is and how to strike it. Because there are for sure also some fans for whom streaming is everything. If you're not streaming then what are you even doing?
And it's like, well, living a life? buying their merch? going to their concerts? There are a lot of different ways to be a fan, and I think it's really hard to remember that when people are so deep into their own experiences of being a fan.
Which, despite how it may appear, I do think is relevant to Yunho's page. Because it's that same--what's happening to me is all that is happening--mentality that it seems like both A and Z universe suffer from
BobbyJ: Yes. If it's not immediately relevant then it's worthless to me. In a way
One thing I am struggling with, because of the way that I am, is the timeline. When does Left Eye's daughter die in relation to Z's takeover? Because context clues are telling me two different things
GD: My context clues say after but I think if I wasn't so heavily picturing Fahrenheit here, I'd be torn between the two as well
BobbyJ: Here's my dilemma:
In strictland, art is banned. We also see lots of evidence of lack of color. The clothes people wear are drab. Even at Prestige, though the clothes are "nice" they're all white and plain. So, how is Left Eye running a boutique? Who's buying his clothes? How are there fashion houses when art is banned?
However, that no one even bothers to care when a child is killed by a car tells me that this is post-takeover.
Unless it's meant to be an extreme example of people being too focused on their own worlds and business
GD: Yeah, the fashion design is... confusing. Though, I've also wondered about the Hunger Games? Like maybe Strictland has an area like the capitol. Art and nice clothes are banned for everyone, except us who live here in the center and have lots of money. But that is undermined by the kids at Prestige. If we knew whether or not Don't Stop was in timeline, I think it would give some evidence that fashion exists for the rich people
BobbyJ: Oh--I think I have evidence that Don't Stop is not Strictland: The deed to the ship says Seoul, Korea on it. Suggests not Strictland
GD: But you know, when the images of Prestige first dropped, you and I talked about how artistic the architecture looked for a society that doesn't allow art. And sure, maybe that's symbolic MV design choices.. film maker discretion and all that. But I guess it could also be that there is a market for art.. as long as it's art meant for the furtherance of Strictland.
BobbyJ: I think perhaps it could have also been an old building that existed before the current anti-art regime
But if my thought that the rich people are the ones buying the memories, that suggests that the rich do at least have privileges the rest of the world doesn't. Which is true everywhere, dystopian universe or not
GD: Well, I guess I would note that it doesn't say he was still working as a fashion designer when his daughter died. Just that he had great skill and was a warm person. We could be missing some temporal context in translation
BobbyJ: If Left Eye experienced great sorrow when his daughter died, wouldn't that mean it was before the takeover? Because it seems like he's in a city with the cars and everything and that a flower seems to be a rarity.
Perhaps the people not caring about a dying child is evidence not of them not having emotions but of just how bad the world was before Z's takeover. It had to have been terrible if everyone agreed to the new plan
GD: This is where Fahrenheit is hurting me. Because in that story, this is how the world is, and it is post the government change to make everyone happy. And like the main character, Montag, insists he's happy, and everyone insists they're happy, and that the government has saved them from having to think by taking away all their books because thinking makes people unhappy. But even a surface level look shows that people are incredibly unhappy.
And it's really hard for me to separate that from what's happening here
But, yes, this could've all happened post Z's takeover. Perhaps Left Eye was chosen to run the dump because he was a true believer in getting rid of feelings because he didn't want to be haunted by his daughter's death. Would explain how he ended up with a high level job
BobbyJ: He doesn't seem to want to be rid of his feelings--just wants to be drunk enough to hallucinate his daughter still being alive.
GD: That could be a change? After getting the first illusion becoming addicted to it. I meant he could've been a true believer to help in Z's rise to power, and then whatever happened subsequently happened.
None of this is told to us, so it is just.. an unknown
BobbyJ: Left Eye being put in charge of the dump has always been a rather large plot hole for me. With the information that we have, it just doesn't make any logical sense.
Like he's already drunk when the guardians find him. His whole purpose in being there is for the smoke
So, you could say, maybe that makes him subservient? But if he's drunk all the time, how does he do his job? And also, what is his job?
GD: I do think it makes sense if you assume that a thing that happened after his daughter's death is that he helped Z come to power because he decided he was right. We shouldn't have emotions. So he was a supporter. But then, after Z came to power, he realizes he doesn't feel better and goes back to the dump to hallucinate. And then the guardians are like, oh this guy, let's just put him in charge here.
I guess what I'm saying is, given enough freedom, which KQ has given me because they haven't told me anything, I can make anything make sense in my head.
I don't know that I think that's what happened to Left Eye, but I can make him coming into that position make sense if I make a bunch of assumptions. The thing is--any reading of the story requires a bunch of assumptions. Making assumptions is baked into the text because it leaves so much out.
BobbyJ: Well now hold on you might be onto something
GD: The guardians themselves are also said to get drunk on the memories? Maybe they were like, ah, a kindred spirit
BobbyJ: I've always assumed that Left Eye knows so much about the technology because he was a former pirate, but what if you're right that he was part of the Z movement? And that's how he knows so much insider information?
GD: We will never know for sure unless they tell us. So I guess the question is, does the answer to Left Eye's past change our interpretation of the story? or even more specifically, our interpretation of Yunho's thoughts here?
BobbyJ: Maybe yes and maybe no. We know (because we've read ahead) that Left Eye feels guilty about his daughter's death the same way Yunho feels guilty about his brother's. But I suppose the reason why he feels guilty isn't the point. It's the fact that he does and Yunho can empathize. So we can proceed off this tangent now
GD: It's interesting? interesting isn't the word, but something like that? that both Yunho's brother and Left Eye's daughter appear to have died because of a car accident
Like, losing someone is losing someone, so it seems like Yunho would've been able to empathize without the connection being so direct?
BobbyJ: I don't know. I think there's a special frustration when a loved one dies because of someone else's carelessness. And I guess a car accident would be the most common way for that to happen, given how distracted people can be while driving, which connects us back to the people never looking anywhere but straight ahead, at whatever their goals are
GD: And it serves to further underline an idea that we've sort of come up to a couple of times: the people of a and z are not as different as they may appear
BobbyJ: Right. Yeo even directly points that out
GD: I have one other thought about the words on the page. The word illusions stands out to me, which I think it's supposed to, but I guess come to think of it, I don't have any thoughts on it.
BobbyJ: It comes up in the next entry as well
GD: I suppose what makes me pause on it is that the song Illusion is generally upbeat and seems to be happy fun summer time (even if we know that's not what it really is but anyways) and this just has such a negative connotation to it, so it sticks in my brain
in a good way
BobbyJ: Illusion is a false happiness. Left Eye thinks he's happy with his daughter back alive. Jongho thinks he's happy playing basketball again
Illusion and Wave are like false happiness vs. true happiness
GD: Mmm interesting. Yeah, I like that wave is like.. overcoming real hardships, but that's actually the truer happiness than a world of make believe
BobbyJ: In Wave, they talk about going through hard times, being tired, not being sure where they're going--but they still move forward. They have goals and they're together
[Editor’s Note: At this point we go off fully on a distantly related tangent that involves quite a lot of reminiscing which I only mention because not mentioning it would make the next part not make sense.]
GD: Have we fully forsaken Yunho? How do we right this ship?
BobbyJ: Well, it's the illusion. Yunho knows that Left Eye can't experience healing while he's still trapped in the illusion of the past
GD: I do want to say something about Illusion the MV while we're here: I have always found Yunho's scene to be incredibly fascinating
BobbyJ: Which makes me wonder if he's let go of the idea of trying to make his brother's dream come true
GD: I'm not sure if he has fully yet--but I do think this is the start of the process
BobbyJ: It's kind of like by helping Left Eye maybe he's realizing some truths about himself as well. Which I think we do see in future entries
GD: It's like when you can see someone else's problems more clearly than your own. I think helping him, helps him see his own problems
Same tiny brain cell
BobbyJ: Working overtime tonight
Okay--what scene in Illusion? If I start watching the mv, it will all be over
GD: Where he's like sitting alone with the plastic wrap and has the hala stuff all around him. It's dark instead of bright colors. And he's maybe reading something?
BobbyJ: In Illusion?
GD: Or looking at something
BobbyJ: Oh no. I'll brb
GD: Wait it's not Illusion. He's in the illusion room but it's Say My Name?
BobbyJ: That's why I was confused
GD: But he's in the Illusion room
BobbyJ: You mean on the flying ship?
GD: We need to take the exit ramp. I shouldn't have brought this up
BobbyJ: We'll have a religious viewing of the treasure mvs at some point and can fall down this rabbit hole
GD: Any other thoughts on the page?
BobbyJ: But back to Yunho, it's interesting that he's taking on a sort of personal sidequest, like Wooyoung. It shows, I think, how they are putting down some tiny roots, or rather making connections that inform their later choices
GD: I thought it was interesting that his entry was all internal monologue almost. He's not actually doing anything in the scene except ruminating and coming to a decision (which is important character development but it's not active in the scene)
BobbyJ: Kind of like how San and Seonghwa just gave us a lot of exposition. Necessary exposition. But that brings us to a question we were supposed to have been asking ourselves but haven't really--why this narrator. For Yunho it's pretty obvious though
GD: I was just thinking that this entry reminds me a little of Yeosang's letter to his father? I'm not sure why. Perhaps a pause in the action
BobbyJ: The narrative stops. It's all internal, like you said. The only real difference is that Yeo had an audience he was speaking to, of sorts
I'm reminded of something that I think the members talked about irl? I feel like they said at one point that Yunho pays the most attention and notices things about people. Like he can tell when people are feeling bad
GD: Hongjoong has said before that Yunho is always the first to notice if he's upset
BobbyJ: And if I'm not just making that up, it adds a very interesting layer of depth to both Yunho's character and his actual personality. Because his idol personality is a very goofy, fun-loving, cheerful guy. But there's a lot more to him than that.
While I'm thinking about the goofiness. . .
GD: I have sometimes wondered if Yunho's cheerful attitude is because he's so aware of other's and wants them to be comfortable. He knows that this attitude is once that produces a desired result. I think it's what makes him and Hongjoong such good MCs. Yunho can make anyone comfortable, and Hongjoong is just so unabashedly curious. Together they're very powerful
BobbyJ: Something I really appreciate about Yunho is that when he does the silly things he does, it doesn't come across to me as him wanting attention but rather wanting to make people happier
GD: Right, he seems like he's just trying to make a warm atmosphere for everyone to be
relaxed in.
Should we consider our patron saints? Don't we have another mid session thing we tried to add that I've forgotten?
BobbyJ: No, just saints
GD: Hmm. Feels like we should have more
BobbyJ: Maybe we did and I've forgotten
GD: Well it must've been unimportant if we've both forgotten
BobbyJ: Let me glance at Jongho pt 1. Oh no that's not a good example because I think that was the day of The Lunch
[Editor's note: GD had a mostly unimportant lunch that somehow took 3 days out of her life with the planning, coordinating, lunching, and post-lunch recovery.]
GD: I'm still recovering from that lunch
BobbyJ: Well, we can ponder another mid study closer and maybe implement it when we get to pt 3.
02: patron saints
BobbyJ: I have decided that I must once again invoke the power of Hongjoong
GD: Well I look forward to a very impressive week from you
BobbyJ: Because school is coming and I don't want to relax. I'm done relaxing. It's time to get to work
GD: I considered Hongjoong for similar reasons. Not school, but the other thing
It bothers me that the Etsy shop has been on vacation mode since we sold out of all our stock during the comeback. I have some stock now, and I need to put it up, but I would also like to make more. So Hongjoong seemed a good fit BUT I am instead going with Yeosang.
BobbyJ: I was about to say I feel a Yeosang to be imminent. Powerful singular brain cell connection on this evening
GD: Perhaps it's the bible study on Sunday as it's meant to be done, the sacredness of the day strengthens the connection
BobbyJ: Thematic
This is why we need a mid study closer. How do we know when we're done
GD: Right. That’s how I feel. Perhaps we should also do a prayer. It’s just we don’t have anyone to pray for yet?
BobbyJ: I have two thoughts
Thought 1: We do like a "thing I'm going to ponder until next week"
Not exactly homework, but something I want to meditate on and bring back with me when we meet next
Thought 2: A praise session
A cheerful thing that is making me happy this week (shamelessly stolen from Pop Culture Happy Hour)
GD: I like praise session better only because I feel like I’d be repeating myself if I did be thing to ponder. I definitely already said I’d ponder 10 things during the course of this session
BobbyJ: I would certainly forget to ponder. Plus, it would have to be something pre-planned I think. Like in an actual bible study, the leader or whoever would be like, everyone think about this verse and we'll share our thoughts next week. That sort of thing. But we have no leader and no plans.
GD: Right. That’s what we need. To hear an official preacher.
BobbyJ: A fun thought experiment, which Ateez would preach the best sermon
GD: Hmmmm hard. My heart says San but I’m not sure why
BobbyJ: I have more thoughts than I expected. A weird venn diagram of life experience coming into play
Anyways, what is the Ateez thing that is making you happy this week?
03: a new thing (praise and prayer)
GD: Does it need to be a thing that came out this past week? Or can it be a thing I rediscovered? What are the parameters?
BobbyJ: Well, on PCHH, they pick something pop culture related that they experienced in the past week. So, it doesn't have to be something new, but it should be something specific. So like, I wouldn't just say "San is really handsome" I'd have to say "the outfit that San wore for Kpoplux was really great and reminded me of how handsome he is"
That is not my thing even though it is true
GD: Okay. I suppose I can’t pick two things
BobbyJ: You can
GD: Okay
The hero who recorded Jongho doing the Macarena made me very happy this week. Also, that we have Jongho singing his proposal in like HD camera recording.
So two Jongho things. How predictable.
BobbyJ: Excellent choices
GD: Oh wait. No. I have something else I have to pick. What if too many things are making me happy?
BobbyJ: If they're all small, you can do a few
GD: Okay, at the end of Kpoplux when Mingi and San were dancing to Rockstar. My KQ stan heart was happy.
BobbyJ: Did you see the clip of San and Hunter?
GD: I did!!!
BobbyJ: Adorable and precious
GD: God, adorable. Also I’m still so impressed with xikers’ Spanish
BobbyJ: Apparently other people were as well
GD: Which is small and only tangentially related to Ateez so I’m also going to claim it.
They were speaking pretty well and like, good sentences. I was able to understand them
BobbyJ: Okay, so I have one and then a half of one sort of that follows on the heels of the first
One of the common tweets I see after any Ateez performance that people can stream is people saying their atiny ego shoots up any time Ateez performs. And that is absolutely true. I've never watched an Ateez performance and thought "wow, that wasn't their best"
Like, sure, sometimes things go wrong, but they always give 110% at least. And they give the impression when they perform that they're actually having a good time doing it. That they are happy with their life choices. And that makes me happy.
And, I really love that they seem to be raising the babies [Editor’s Note: We call xikers “the babies” most of the time. You’re just going to have to make your peace with that.] to be the same way. To appreciate actually being able to perform and to have a good time doing it
GD: It is so true. Like, I never have to worry about how their performance is going to go. I can just… enjoy it? And there’s something very lovely about that.
BobbyJ: So my KQ family heart is quite full after this weekend
GD: KQ only hires the most precious people.
BobbyJ: And also I'm very excited about Koong. My little baby happy thing
GD: Even rereading my love letter to the man in the white sweater this week made me 🥰
BobbyJ: I have a tangent about companies that I'll save for later bc it's late. Or maybe I'll forget about forever, it's fine
GD: Especially late for you
BobbyJ: Good work everybody
GD: I do feel like we should throw a Halazia out.
Bible study should end with our version of the Hail Mary
Be the light
BobbyJ: Halazia
Thank you for being with us this Sunday morning! We hope you enjoyed diving into Yunho's page. Next Sunday we will be back with Yunho again to do our sacred practice and consider our final takeaways!
In the meantime, what do you think of Yunho's journey with Left Eye? Any theories about Left Eye's timeline or past? Or just let us know what ATEEZ things had you feeling happy this week!
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