[Note: This series originally started as a project on Reddit. You can find an explanation of what Bible Study is all about here.]
After a brief hiatus for the comeback and the holiday season, we are back with the (I assume) long awaited Part 2 of our close reading of Hongjoong's page. If you recall, on this page, we start to see HalaTEEZ through Hongjoong's eyes, and it brings up a lot of questions.
Questions to which we arrive at no answers.
Instead, we spend time on our sacred practice for the day, which is the reading practice. In our sacred reading practice, we take a single line from the text (decided randomly), and contemplate it asking 4 questions: 1) what is happening at a narrative level; 2) what is happening at a metaphorical level; 3) what does this remind me of in my own life; and 4) what is the text inviting me to do?
Let's get started!
GD: Do we know what sacred practice we need to do today?
Bobby: Reading
GD: Oh god. The big one
Okay. I should buckle up
Let me get us a line
04: sacred practice
GD: I got 23, which I interpret as:
"The man put his hand on the glass wall and told us to copy him"
Lol. So I guess, what is happening at a narrative level?
Bobby: So, Hongjoong was trying to break Halajoong out and was asking questions. Halajoong said there's no time bc the smoke will clear.
GD: This is stupid, but upon reading it just now, it's the first time I realized that all 8 of them put their hands on the glass
Bobby: Honestly, they don't really make it super clear sometimes
GD: No they don't
Okay. What is happening at a metaphorical/allusory level? What other media are we reminded of or what other parts in this story?
The first thing that comes to mind for me is the san and Wooyoung in ES and Wooyoung in Turbulence? With the outreached hand?
I don't think it's the exact same, but that is what I thought of first
And it also reminds me of the famous art by the famous artist I should know that is also referenced on the back of the one PC for this comeback.
That is the clearest I've ever been. So if anyone doesn't know what I'm talking about that's on them.
Bobby: I'm reminded of SMN, for obvious reasons. But the scene with half of them on one side of the glass partition and the other half on the other
Bobby: Creation of Adam?
GD: Yes, there it is
I agree with SMN
Which also gets you to Alice through the looking glass (specifically talking about the tim burton movie because I haven't read that book)
And the Answer Ode to Joy stage for obvious reasons
Bobby: Then this needs to be our next book
GD: I would need to read the first one as well
Bobby: Excellent. They are my actual favorite
GD: Shall we then?
Bobby: Yes
GD: Set a date? booktiny rides again
Ideally, read them before the comeback
Bobby: They are an easy read, being for children and all
I feel like putting your hand on two sides of a glass wall or window is a common thing. I'm remembering it in a zoo context with a gorilla
OH
Return to Me
GD: That sounds sad
Bobby: Terribly
GD: I had to look it up
I do think the hand on the window is pretty tropey, honestly
Bobby: Like a so close yet so far thing
GD: Exactly
Especially common for like couples
Prisoners
Bobby: I'm remembering it happening in Psych but I wonder if I have the wrong show
GD: Lassiter does it when Marlow is in jail, I think
I don't remember if her name is Marlow
Bobby: I'm remembering Sean (Shawn?) and What's her face, in like a quarantine situation
So many shows have had quarantines though
GD: Oh yeah! Juliet gets the like... something flu, and they have to go find a vaccine for her. That is definitely a thing that happens. But it's used for this like.. longing for a thing you can't have?
I don't know if that's the best way to phrase it
Bobby: No, it makes sense
Like in Dear Evan Hansen
Waving through a window
I'm not sure though that Ateez are necessarily 'longing' for Halateez, not even really metaphorically
GD: I agree
Which takes me back to the creation
Because what they are doing is creating them in their image
Bobby: Yes. Quite literally
GD: I think the trope of reaching out for someone to save you or for your savior is also quite common
Bobby: Also reaching out to save someone
So I've been reading that Gretchen Rubin book we said we were going to read for booktiny ages ago
Before the exodus
I have reached the section on touch, which is the last one.
GD: Oh interesting
My other friend said I actually should read that book
Bobby: Well, I have a lot of thoughts and feelings
At the beginning of each section she talks about her research into the importance of whatever sense she's talking about. These are always my favorite parts. The importance of skin-on-skin contact is very interesting.
Like, touch is the thing that truly grounds us in the world
There are times when we feel we can't trust our eyes or ears, but touch we rely on
GD: I know from my child birthing years that skin to skin is considered one of the most important things you can do for your baby
Bobby: Yes. Babies who receive skin contact gain weight faster and develop more quickly
I say as someone who never has had and never will have a child
But there's something there about the transference of power and energy
GD: Right. I'm also thinking about warmth?
Bobby: Yes, warmth generally giving a feeling of safety
But if there's a glass partition blocking the contact
Does any of this really matter? Is there something there about not really being able to make contact?
GD: There's a line in Halazia
Bobby: Yes. I remember talking about this line
GD: Did I make this up? I can't find it
Bobby: Were you thinking of the sound of love's breath?
GD: I must've been
Because it's all I have
Bobby: Maybe mixed with color this infinitely cold world
GD: I FOUND IT
It's in turbulence
Bobby: Also a song we talked about with Halazia
GD: A rough fight, tiring day / embrace me in your warm arms / every night, a cold heart
Can someone just embrace me?
I'd conflated the lines and was remembering it as a longing for warmth, but that's sort of what it is, so I won't say I was wrong
Bobby: Well, yeah
Not wrong. Right-adjacent
GD: Should we move to what this reminds us of in our own life?
It's getting quite late
Bobby: Yes. I have taken meds [Editor’s Note: I was very sick for this bible study, fyi.]
So, I may get either insane or emotional if we go too much longer
GD: This reminds me of being a child and being told to follow the teacher
That's all I can think of in my head
Bobby: I'm not certain it really reminds me of anything?
GD: It's so specific
Bobby: Maybe a little bit of when I handed off yearbook to the lady who replaced me
GD: And also, I do think tropey
A replacement makes sense
Bobby: I think I've always had a fear of being easily replaced, so Halateez just taking it in stride, actively seeking it out, is interesting
GD: Yes, I have, in the past, had a tendency to try to make myself irreplaceable--like if I take on enough and show people how much they need me and how no one else can do what I do in the way that I do it, they will realize they can't replace me
And I say in the past because I've come to realize that it's sort of true? I don't have to try so hard to be irreplaceable because we all are. You can get a different person, but it will be done a different way.
Did I ever tell you the advice my mentor teacher gave me about taking on responsibility at school?
"If you died at 10:00 am, they'd have someone in to replace you at noon. You don't owe them anything."
Bobby: It's true. I guess for me it's not so much about work though.
For Halateez, they seem to really understand their role in the story.
LIke, our part is over now (or for now, who knows)
GD: I wonder if that's a certainty that comes with knowing the future or if it's just self assurance on what they want/need
Bobby: Hard to say for sure. Just because I know the future doesn't mean I have to accept it
GD: That's true. And I think, in fact, a lot of people who know what the future will hold would fight against it
Have I mentioned lately how much I love Jongho?
Should we discuss what this is inviting us to do in our own lives?
Bobby: Yes
GD: I think, for me, it's inviting me to know when to lead and know when to follow. Which is maybe silly. But I think there's something nice about the confidence with which Halateez goes into this, and it's equally nice the way Ateez doesn't push back or fight against it.
Bobby: Well, I have a theory about that, but it's just a theory. So perhaps you're right
I think maybe for me it's a reminder that being replaced is a part of life. When your role in one story ends, perhaps it's just to make room for you in a new story
GD: A hard thing to accept
Shall we say a prayer for Hongjoong? Is it weird that I don't know that we were talking about Hongjoong a single time today?
Bobby: He was just the vehicle
I think Hongjoong needs the confidence to embody the shoes he's been tasked with filling
That made very little sense
But I can't do better
GD: Yes, may Hongjoong find the leader inside of him
Or something like that
Patron saints? a hymn?
Bobby: Hymn patron saints
05: connections and takeaways (previously mental murder board)
GD: Wait
We didn't talk about connections and takeaways
I don't have any. I've lost the plot. I'm too tired.
Wait
I can do this
Bobby: I am drugged. Half asleep
GD: This is the first time I considered the part that all of them had to play in the meeting of halateez
Perhaps the reason none of the other boys were surprised is that they had been visited by their hala self
And also, that all of Ateez had to touch the glass for their counterparts' clothes to transition.
So we see them all take a step together here.
My two takeaways
06: closing
GD: Okay, now we can go back to our hymn for Hongjoong
Have we used Deja Vu?
Bobby: Yes
GD: Upsetting
Bobby: SMN?
GD: Oh! Yes, that's very good
I am looking at our bible study page in the notion and realizing with a dawning horror that there are literal things we were supposed to track in this mental murder board
that's fine.. we'll get them next time
Bobby: The notion.
I think I will return to someday
GD: Have you considered your patron saint?
Bobby: I need a strong boy to help me through crisis
GD: I do not suggest Mingi
Mingi is a great boy, but having just gone through a crisis, I felt what Mingi was telling me to do was say 'fuck it' to everyone else and focus on me
What about Wooyoung?
Bobby: I've been extremely emotional and fully insecure and would love to get that locked down because I am EXHAUSTED with myself.
GD: It does sound very tiring
Hongjoong rarely shows insecurity
Perhaps he is the boy for you
By which I mean, he seems to be fully confident with himself
Bobby: Hongjoong feels right
GD: I have decided to return to my faithful companion: Yeosang
Perhaps I am just at a time in my life when I really need Yeosang
Or perhaps I'm in my Yeosang era
Bobby: No one is more multi-purpose than Yeo
GD: But I just have a lot of work to be getting along with, and I need to find the inner will to just complete it, and also I need to have a better attitude about it
Yeosang brings a lot of goodness to my life
Bobby: A good boy can do that
GD: I think he has a lot of traits I feel I lack in myself, so he can inspire me in a way some of the other ones who I already relate to can't
Alright, now that we've done all the things, we can say our final rosary and retire for the evening. The week shall be blessed because of our good works here today and the good boys we will be taking with us.
Bobby: So excited to not be awake anymore
GD: 8 makes
Bobby: 1 team
GD: Be the light
Bobby: Halazia
We made it
GD: To a blessed week
Felt like a marathon and a sprint
Closing
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