[Note: This series originally started as a project on Reddit. You can find an explanation of what Bible Study is all about here.]
Welcome back for our second week discussing Jongho's page in Fever Pt.3 where we will tackle our sacred practice in order to find new meaning. Today's sacred practice is sermon building, and we will each take a turn building a sermon based on a line from Jongho's page.
04: sacred practice
GD: Let me pick my line.. I am still undecided
Well, I have a couple of options. The first one is 'please take me with you! Please, don't leave me here!' so if you're not also going to do that one, I will use it
Bobby: No, I'm not sure what I want, but that wasn't one of my options
GD: Okay, I'll share first
If I was to build a sermon around this line, I would talk about one of the topics I spend the most time thinking about, which is community. All people have to find that place where we belong, and it can be scary to lose a community that you've been a part of. But, it does happen. People grow and change, and sometimes communities that once fit perfectly don't really fit at all anymore. I think both of us, or at least me, experienced this a little bit when we decided to leave Reddit. But I can think of other times in my life when this has been true too: when I stopped practicing law, when I graduated highschool early and went to college before my friends, when my ex husband and I got a divorce. Like, in all of those moments, it was so, so scary to be left alone, and isolated from the thing that held the community I was part of together. But in the end, they were all the right things to do. I had to leave those communities. And that's true for Jongho too--there was another community waiting for him. And I'm sure it was hard and probably not immediate, but he did find a new place to belong. And that would be what my sermon is about: knowing that there is another community out there you can belong to if you are brave enough and true enough to yourself to go find it.
Whew. a big sermon.
Bobby: Oh. Wow. A good Word. I feel convicted
I'm sure I've mentioned before about my friend group that fell apart and scattered--to the point that most of us do not live in the same state any more. And I can attest that finding that new community is very difficult. Especially for introverts with niche interests. But I agree that community is essential.
GD: I think community is so interesting.. and maybe it's not even community that's essential as much as connection? Like, we need to know that we're connected to other people. It's probably easy to slip oneself into some sort of community, but that doesn't mean the connection would be there.
Like, we both identify as atinys--which is a type of community. But I don't' feel connection to all atinys. It's a select group of people who I consider part of my actual community within the group of atinys.
Yesterday my husband and I were driving in our town's downtown, which is basically nonexistent except for a giant, old, beautiful baptist church. And I thought, 'man, if we were church people, I bet we could know every powerful person in this town if we went to that church.
And that story doesn't really have a point except that, I could probably go to that church and slip myself into that community if I wanted to--but that doesn't mean we'd have any connection to the people there
Bobby: In my experience, which is extensive, churches are tricky.
Because they preach and sell this idea that "we're all the same here, we all believe the same thing, so we're family" and. . . no, actually.
I think that's what it's supposed to be, but it's not what it is
GD: That's my experience as well
Bobby: At the same time, I've met some of the absolute best people at a church. And again, in my experience, they are never the people with any sort of "power" or "prestige" in the church
GD: If my husband and I went together with our child, and they understood that my husband had a nice engineering job at a contractor for the government, and we dressed the part appropriately, I feel sure we could fit in.
But if they found out Geoff was William's step dad? If they found out what I do for a living? If I dressed in a way I normally dress?
No. We would be the the black sheeps of the church, I feel sure
Bobby: It all depends on the church. I've been to some that are far more accepting of people who don't "fit in" or whatever--but it has always seemed to me that churches like that are more about the spectacle of worship than any actual community building. Like with atinys, we may all love Ateez, but you really need people who interact with them in the same way you do to actually be able to form a community.
I'm never going to vibe with someone who loves criticizing everything Ateez or Eden or KQ does even though we both like the group
Nor would I be able to deal with someone who lives and breathes Ateez to the point that they can't do anything else
GD: Honestly, I'd be far more likely to vibe with someone who didn't follow ateez and followed a different group than I would some of the solo stans and KQ antis
Bobby: Or people who flippantly sexualize the "plain" members
GD: As if there was a plain member
I'll never be over it
Bobby: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all that, but some people are just dumb
I've forgotten my line
GD: I think that's why the field of dreams resonated with me so much? The idea that if you build the thing you want, you can find the community that appreciates it.
But yes, time for your sermon
Bobby: Ah. Right. Found it.
The line that I'm going with is "Just before I crashed to the floor someone grabbed my arm." Which feels a bit related to your sermon about community because the idea that I'm pondering is that we need those friends and need to be the friend who will grab someone's arm before they do something destructive. It's not something that I'm particularly good at because I strongly believe in people doing what's best for them and making their own decisions. And I also hate confrontation with my entire soul. But I know in the past there have been times when I've seen some red flags in someone's behavior or in the behavior of people around them but I haven't said anything because it 'wasn't any of my business.' And when things went poorly, I've wondered if I could have done something to prevent it or to soften the fallout somehow. It's impossible to say because people do also need to learn their own lessons. Still though, I think the sorts of friends who say "just delete reddit already, it doesn't make you happy" and who call you out on your bullshit are the best friends to have and to be. They are worth finding and very much worth keeping.
GD: You know, it's very hard to know when it's 'your place' to interfere or comment in someone else's decisions.
I'm also not very good at reaching out to grab someone--I'm pretty good at cheerleading them forward or encouraging a decision I feel they already want to make.. but I'm bad at being like, hey, that's probably not the best choice
Bobby: Well, it entirely depends on your relationship, I think?
I think too it matters where the warnings are coming from. If I'm giving someone "advice" from a place of jealousy or judgment, it's never going to be received well, no matter how valid it is.
It's very tricky. But maybe, depending on this situation, it's more important for me to reach out and share what I'm feeling or seeing rather than be worried about potential awkwardness.
And also, if you give advice, you have to be prepared for people to ignore it
And to still love them when they do
GD: Yeah, I do want to be the type of person who can share what I think without being afraid it'll be awkward or ruin everything (I can be very fatalistic)
Bobby: Yes. I know I'm terrible at giving people the benefit of the doubt.
It seems bad for me to think that my friendship would be ruined if I speak my mind--implies that my friend is very delicate
GD: That the friend is delicate or the relationship itself is somehow delicate
Bobby: Yes. I mean, some are. But are those relationships worth keeping?
GD: A question I ask myself a lot
Bobby: Lots of big questions today
Are we ready for Final Thoughts and Takeaways?
GD: Yes
05: connections and takeaways (previously mental murder board)
Bobby: My current takeaway is that I love Jongho a lot and I'm sending him my most powerful get well wishes so he can be reunited with his people
GD: I suppose my current takeaway is similar--it really has nothing to do with the plot. My takeaway is that I'm so super grateful Jongho found his community, and I hope he feels their presence with him during this time. So even while I know he can't be physically with his community, I hope he can feel his connection to them.
Bobby: My other takeaway is that I very much appreciate that Ateez and KQ and the Intern have crafted a world that lends itself to big conversations and bigger questions
GD: All good art does
Maybe I'll finish my post about art today
I am feeling a little inspired
Bobby: Excellent. A reminder I need to do my wtww for this week.
On to closing then?
GD: Yes
06: closing
GD: I always forget when the patron saint comes in
Bobby: A hymn for Jongho first
GD: It's a shame we've used Be With You
Bobby: Then prayer then patron saints
I have a thought
We're okay with using anything from KQ family, right?
GD: I certainly am
And since it's just us lol
Bobby: Hold Me by Eden
GD: Mmmm yes
I love it
Bobby: Alright then. Prayer for Jongho?
GD: My prayer for story Jongho is similar to what I said in my takeaway about real Jongho. I hope he feels his connection to his new community even when he cannot be physically with them.
Bobby: Yes. And I want him to let go of the guilt and shame from his injury. Whether it was a mistake on his part or not, it has brought him to arguably a much better place with friends who have proven they won't abandon him.
Patron saints time
GD: I think I'm going to choose Yeosang. I have a lot of hard work to complete this week, only some of which I think I will enjoy doing, so I need his work ethic and effort to power me through
Bobby: I am actually also choosing Yeosang--retaining him actually. I don't think I invoked him enough last week. And I also feel kind of blind heading into this week. So I need a boy who can wear a lot of hats.
GD: Makes sense
I think this is the first time we've retained a boy
Bobby: You mean shared a boy? Yes. I kept Mingi for two weeks once
GD: I forgot about keeping Mingi twice
Well, the good news is, I feel Yeosang is powerful enough for us to share
Bobby: I feel like we'll be using different powers for each of us. So it's fine
Okay. Here it is. The most worrisome part
GD: I feel like, actually, the most relevant and appropriate thing today is the thing we've used for like the last month? which makes me wonder if we should just.. use that always
Is 8 makes ever not relevant?
Bobby: Never
GD: And what does that say about the overall story of ateez and their themes
Which I think is very interesting
Bobby: Well, I'm feeling salty at solo stans right now, so it's fully appropriate for me personally
GD: Perhaps what I'm really feeling inspired to write is something about the idea of community
so anyways
Let's do this for ateez
8 makes
Bobby: 1 team
GD: Be the light
Bobby: Halazia
GD: Nailed it
Thank you for joining us as we missed Jongho and thought a lot of big big thoughts about community. If you'd like to see where my inspiration led me, you can see my post about ATEEZ and community here. We will be back next week with part 1 of Yunho's page!
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